Posted on Nov 20, 2012

LinkedIn Headline Disasters

I used to think that the worst thing you could do on LinkedIn was hold your grumpy looking cat in your Profile Picture. And while a poorly executed LinkedIn Profile Picture is still considered one of the highest LinkedIn offenses, I’ve recently stumbled upon another self-damaging disaster:

Poorly written LinkedIn Headline Job Titles

Below, IntaPeople (a UK-based recruitment consultancy) lists the “10 strangest job titles on LinkedIn”:*

  1. Digital Overlord
  2. Creator of Happiness
  3. Retail Jedi
  4. Wizard of Light Bulb Moments
  5. Dream Alchemist
  6. Chief Chatter
  7. Change Magician
  8. Accounting Ninja
  9. Chief Biscuit Dunker
  10. Direct Mail Demi-God

Here are a few of my “favorite” Headline Job Title Catastrophes:

Solar Specialist – Is this person a sun-worshipping tanning addict? A Los Angeles weatherman? Or is she Professor Trelawney, crystal gazing to see if you’re going to accept her “Link Request” ?

Audio Communications – Is this person a Lyngdorf stereo? Morse Code?

Results Catalyst – I guess this is better than “Fire Starter”.  Drew Berrymore already has that job title sewn up.

Geek, Author – I appreciate the honesty, but pointing out you’re a geek probably won’t help you attract many job offers.

Region Head – Is this like a Talking Head, but larger?

Entertainment Professional – I hope women who work in the “World’s Oldest Profession” aren’t using LinkedIn to attract customers.

General – How can this person be a general when they weren’t even in the military!

Creator – Well, at least they didn’t say there were: “THE Creator.”

Changemaker – Anybody have change for a $5?

Happiness Advisor – As a Coach, I’m all about helping people find happiness and success, but “Happiness Advisor” is a bit over the top as a Professional Job Title.


Have you seen any bizarre or humorous LinkedIn Headlines? Share them below!



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